the old line state
2007-06-01 12:29 p.m.

hey WHOOPS i keep forgetting to update. maybe that's fine.

back in maryland, official name, the pollen-coated state. i took the auto-train up here and got an unprecedented 6 hours of sleep, thanks to two plastic cups of white wine and a sleeping pill and sticky, waxy, unsavory earplugs that created perfect vacuums in my ears. the train was full of old people. let's try again. i am not pleased.

back in maryland, official name, the shopping-plaza state. i have a new car donated to me by my lovely uncle. 98 honda, which is new to me, though it has no tape or cd player, which doesn't matter, because i have bought a gadget OMG is that my high school english teacher??

back in maryland, official name, the my-throat-hurts-state. i'm in the public library using the free wireless, and i thought i saw my dough-faced high school english teacher, may she burn in hell. but it was not her; it was some other shapeless mound of devil-clay. being in maryland confuses me. i am not sure if i'm supposed to feel at home. mostly i fear going out in public, because i'd like to avoid running into people from high-middle-elementary school, many of whom work as waiters and hostesses and cashiers. it makes me uncomfortable, at first i felt more successful, look at me, i'm getting my master's, people like my writing, i don't, that's no matter, you're a cashier, that sucks, but you're making more than 9,000 a year, who's more successful? what's an MFA?

back in maryland, official name, the dads-in-socks-n-sandals state. can the man behind me see my underwear? i've got to continue online dating, but i'm so horribly unenthused about it. but i must. what accounts for large number of young men doing online dating who are really, really into video games? or maybe they just like me a lot. there is, perhaps, only a small percentage of gamers on these terrible dating sites, but they flock to me like wasps to my apartment. oh wait i'm not supposed to write about that stuff anymore.

back in maryland, am i ever gong to write fiction again? i hate it so much. it is so rarely fun. it goes it cycles, do you know? it's horrible, tough, wading through hot tar. then it's okay. at best it's okay. i better get something done this summer. i'm going to get a sandwich.